Monthly Archives: July 2010

Still Listening

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Still Listening

“They don’t know what it’s like to love one band,

one silly piece of music so much it hurts.” – Almost Famous

Sometimes I find it hard to believe they exist. I temporarily forget about the hours of love I’ve put into this band. I forget about how A Song To Sing was the first song I listened to when I got This Time Around. I forget that Underneath reminds me of developing photos in the dark toom at Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts.

It’s nights like last night when I am going to see them as if it’s a regular occurrence that gets me. Nights when I stand there and it’s all so surreal. Instead of feeling the anticipation, I am confused because this isn’t the way it’s supposed to be. It’s supposed to be instant friends and sing alongs in line. It’s supposed to be hours of excitement, necks craned to sneak a glance and endless wonderment. It’s supposed to be a group of my friends who know all the words, not me and my own doubt to memorize the new album.

The shows start off surreal in an odd mixture of familiarity and something else all together. Just before Isaac, Taylor and Zac appear, my excitement is at its highest. The moment the music begins to play I’ve forgotten how to breathe, I can’t stop smiling and the beat takes over. Everything comes rushing back in the form of cords and piano keys. I am at home, where I’m supposed to be.

I used to be so proud to shout it out, tell others that Hanson is my favourite band. I was happy and defensive, stubborn when I tried to convince you of their worth. Now I find myself trying to avoid announcing it to the work crew that Hanson is who I am going to see. It’s not that I’ve stopped caring, it’s that I’ve realized that no one else does. I can go without a round of co-workers singing Mmmbop terribly (and with the wrong words). This makes me feel like I’m harbouring a secret, indulging in a guilty pleasure, but it isn’t that at all.

It’s that Hanson is so ingrained in who I am, I don’t need to explain it to anyone else because they will not get it, even if I want them to. To them, Mmmbop it a long forgotten one hit wonder by boys who don’t exist anymore. It doesn’t matter though, because I’m still listening and that’s all that really does matter.

Saturday Seven 07/03/10

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Saturday Seven includes seven recommendations from me,  usually in the form of the things that I adore: blogs, books, movies and music. I’d love recommendations from you, too, so don’t hesitate to share the love!
Blog: Ashley Lorelle – I admit to taking the idea of using my first and middle name (for this blog) from this amazing writer. Ashley Lorelle just graduated from school in Albany and she’s writing about her new life on her own with her car. Though her posting isn’t always consistent, she’s a great friend and I look forward to reading when she does post.
Movie: The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus – I adore this movie. It’s magical and a little cryptic and dark. Though it may be a little confusing, you’ve got to accept the fact that nothing is going to make complete sense. It partially takes place inside the imagination of characters and involves betting with The Devil. The colours are fantastic, the characters are likeable and as Heath Ledger’s final movie I think  he did an excellent job. Extra bonuses: Johnny Depp & Jude Law.
Book: My Name is Memory – Ann Brashares – I’ve been a fan of Brashares’ work since the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants series, but this one is on an entirely different level. I love books with a certain amount of near impossible love and super natural elements. This is a book that goes through time, as Daniel Grey, who remembers all of his past lives, tries to capture the heart of the soul he’s been in love with throughout all of his memory. It’s the first in a trilogy, however, so that’s something to remember once you’ve gotten to the end.

Album: Hanson – Shout It out – Guys, I know Hanson is so 1997. They went out with Mmmbop back when we were preteens, or whatever. But, admittingly, Hanson has been my favourite band for THIRTEEN years! Their new album is a mixture fun, dance worthy pop songs and ballads with a lot of depth. It’s not my favourite of theirs, but I do enjoy most of the songs.
Food: Vegetable Samosas – I am absolutely obsessed with this Indian appetizer. I can’t go to an Indian restaurant without ordering Samosas first, and half the time I’d be happy to leave with only have eating them. Yum.
Photograph: I took this earlier today during my break from my bike ride. I sat down for a while and tried to meditate (and took pictures on my phone) in the bogs.

Video: Flash mobs fascinate me.

<3. Melanie.Kristy

Sometimes Faith Sneaks Up On You

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I’m writing this for Olga, who is having a bit of a crisis of faith lately. I don’t talk much about religion. I was raised Catholic and I never liked being told that I was a sinner or that I was not allowed to believe in ghosts. I need to go over my background a little before I talk more about what I want to write about.

Since then I’ve been to religious retreats, we changed to a Protestant church and attended for a while where I had to go to Vacation Bible Study. I used to try to oversleep on Sunday mornings but it never worked out. I slowly stopped believing and by 8th grade I deemed myself an Athiest. I couldn’t be bothered to think about religion, it confused me and aggrevated me and I hated being preached to. Within the past couple of years I’ve been more interesting in opening up my spirituality. Since then I’ve realized that I am very agnostic, but I really don’t know where to go from there.

I’ve always celebrated Christian holidays. That’s how I was raised, and I cannot shed those traditions. I know some Bible stories and I believe that Jesus existed. Do I worship him? I’m not so sure. But at the moment I am happy to spend time seeking out religion and spirituality and I am content in exploring it in my own way.

I also need to make note that I am not a lucky person. My brother is lucky, he won a lap top in a raffle one time, he wins random scratch tickets and other odd things. I mostly stop trying to be lucky. It prevents me from setting myself up for disappointment.

A couple months ago I had a thing going on with this guy who stopped responding to me after one night we had hung out together. I was agitated and crushed because I really liked him, and I’m not used to really liking guys. All I wanted was some sort of answer as to why. Not knowing, in my opinion, is worse than knowing and being hurt. It’s worse to question and wonder and think about the possibilities. It’s worse when you have no control over the situation to even find out the truth.

Two days after this night with this night with this guy I went to a church for the first time in years. It wasn’t for a service but for a charity breakfast at the church my friend goes to. There were all sorts of raffles lining the tables. You could buy raffle tickets and pick what gifts you might be able to win. I didn’t think about buying any tickets. I didn’t have extra cash that week, and I don’t normally win anyway. Juli, however, had a few extra dollars. She bought tickets and distributed them between myself, herself and her cousin.

I picked two things to drop raffle tickets into. I only had four tickets so I put two in each. Wouldn’t you believe that I WON one of those packages? I put tickets in a package that included a couple gift cards for stores and restaurants around Plymouth and one for a relaxation package that included a gift certificate for a massage, a bamboo wind chime, lavender candles and some lavender scented Paul Mitchell products. I won the relaxation package and my immediate thought was; God is telling me to calm the fuck down.
Who cares about this guy, really? I mean, I did. But I knew it was going to be okay. I felt like I was being watched over at that moment while I ate my pancakes.

A few days ago on Olga’s post I told her that maybe God isn’t showing himself to her because he wants her to find him. I feel like maybe, by going to that breakfast on that day, that’s exactly what I had done.

<3 Melanie. Kristy

Things I Love Thursday

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Sometimes I love so many things I don’t know where to start!

* Walks with Chance

* When the weather is in the 60s and 70s

* United States of Tara (the last episode of this season was excellent!)

* My pseudo nephew Trent. He’s amazing and beautiful and adorable and so smart for a two year old.

* Having a clean car

* Clambakes

* Having a great time at Foxwoods, even though I have no interest in gambling

* Writing blog entries during my lunch breaks

* Mocha Frappuccinos with Soy milk

* New book shelves (To be painted blue soon. Pictures in the near future).

What’s on your love list today?

xoxo. Melanie.Kristy

Writing Prompts

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Sometimes we all need a prompt to get us going. In the future I plan on using these prompts, too. But it’s late and I forgot to post, so here’s what I have for now.

Write about something you would like to do daily if time and money weren’t an issue.
If you were a crayon colour what would you be called and why?
Write a piece of flash fiction or a poem involving all of these words: magnificent, grimy, affect, teacup, lethargy, sparkling.